Charlie’s Raven (Excerpt XI)《查理的渡鸦》(节选十一)
作者: 琼·克雷格黑德·乔治/文 吴文安/译析The DNA test showed that Blue Sky and Pinecone were, indeed, brother and sister. It also revealed that Blue Sky was a male and Pinecone a female.
DNA检测结果显示,蓝天和松果的确是兄妹。结果还显示,蓝天是雄鸟,松果是雌鸟。
“We guessed right,” said Charlie and rolled his eyes at Granddad who pretended not to hear. He didn’t like to be accused of guessing.
“我们猜对了。”查理说,同时朝着爷爷白了一眼。爷爷装作没有听见。查理不喜欢被人指责为胡乱猜测。
One morning when the raven parents dropped off Pinecone at the Raven Day Care Center, Blue Sky tried to lure his sister into Granddad’s house for breakfast. He called “gro, gro, gro” from Charlie’s shoulder. Pinecone fluttered her wings like a hungry, begging fledgling but would not come down from the roof. Blue Sky “quorked” and flew to the woodpile, called her once more, then flew to Charlie’s shoulder.
一天早上,渡鸦父母又把松果带到“渡鸦日托中心”来了,蓝天试图引诱妹妹到爷爷的房子里来吃早饭。蓝天站在查理的肩膀上,“咕噜,咕噜,咕噜”叫着。松果拍打着翅膀,就像一只饥饿难耐、乞求食物的雏鸟一样,可是不肯从房顶上下来。蓝天“咕咕”叫着,飞到木柴堆上,再次招呼妹妹,然后飞到查理肩膀上。
“Pinecone won’t come into the house,” he said to Blue Sky. “Your raven mom put her in the Day Care Center, and she’s not going to leave until her tells her to.”
“松果不愿意进屋呢。”查理对蓝天说,“你们的渡鸦妈妈把她送到日托中心来,除非妈妈让她走她才会走。”
Inside the house Blue Sky flew to Granddad, who praised him effusively. The Blue Sky proceeded to praise himself in fancy postures and feather displays.
到了屋里,蓝天就飞到爷爷那里,爷爷毫不吝啬地夸奖他。蓝天于是开始夸奖自己,摆出各种炫酷的姿势,并展示自己的羽毛。
“Some ego,” Granddad said.
“有点自傲了。”爷爷说。
After breakfast Granddad went to his desk and made notes, then walked to his easy chair. Charlie exchanged glances with Grandma Sally. Granddad was walking steadily. He was not only better, but a lot better.
早餐之后,爷爷走到桌前做笔记,然后走到自己的安乐椅那里去。查理和奶奶莎莉互相使了几次眼色。爷爷走路很稳健。他不止是好一点了,是好多了。
Blue Sky is curing Granddad, he wrote in his notebook that night, then erased it. Not enough evidence for Granddad. I’ll keep observing.
蓝天正在治好爷爷的病,查理那天晚上在自己的笔记里这样写道,然后又将这句话擦掉了。对爷爷而言,证据仍不充分。我还需要继续观察。
A few days later at breakfast Charlie saw Blue Sky snatch the orange pill when Grandma Sally pushed the little plate of pills to Granddad.
几天后,吃早饭的时候,查理看到蓝天要去抢夺爷爷橙色的药丸。那时奶奶莎莉把药丸放在小盘子里,推给爷爷吃。
“No!” Granddad shouted and took it from the raven. “It’ll kill you! I detest’em.” Charlie laughed and suggested to Grandma Sally that she serve the pills another way.
“不要抢!”爷爷喊道,一边把盘子从渡鸦那里拿开,“药丸会毒死你的!我不喜欢药丸。”查理大笑,建议奶奶莎莉换一种方法来给爷爷服药。
The next day she blended the pills into Granddad’s scrambled egg. When the little dish did not appear, Blue Sky lifted his feathers until he looked to be twice his size and flew to the kitchen counter. “Ca, ca, ca, ca, ca!” he yelled in anger, threw open Grandma Sally’s recipe box, and grabbed a card in his beak. In an instant he had it shredded in pieces.
第二天,奶奶把药丸混到了爷爷的炒鸡蛋里。这一次,小盘子没有出现,蓝天于是撑起了他的羽毛,看上去有平时的两倍大,又飞到厨房的台子上。“咔,咔,咔,咔,咔!”蓝天愤怒地尖叫,一下子把奶奶莎莉的食谱盒子掀开,用嘴巴叼起了一张卡片,一瞬间就把卡片撕碎了。
“Blue Sky! NO!” Grandma Sally shouted. “Bad bird. Bad Bird!” She shook her finger at him, and Charlie rolled his eyes at Granddad. The B word had been spoken.
“蓝天!不要!”奶奶莎莉高喊,“坏鸟。坏鸟!”奶奶朝着蓝天摇了摇手指,查理朝着爷爷翻了翻白眼。奶奶终于说了咒骂的话。
“He’s just being a raven, Sally,” Granddad said. “He’s not bad. You messed up his routine.”
“他不过是一只渡鸦罢了,莎莉。”爷爷说,“他不坏。是你搞砸了他的套路。”
“Being a raven, nothing,” Grandma Sally snapped. “In my world what Blue Sky did is bad! He destroyed property.”
“作为一只渡鸦,这倒没什么。”莎莉厉声说道,“在我这儿,蓝天就是做了坏事!他毁东西。”
Charlie saw it was time to take Blue Sky outdoors and reached with both hands to pick him up. In a black mood of pique, Blue Sky dodged Charlie and flew to the door. “KEK!” he screamed.
查理见此情景,觉得应该把蓝天弄到屋外去了,就伸出双手,想把蓝天捧起来。蓝天正恼怒着呢,就躲开查理,飞到门口去。“嘅嘅!”蓝天尖叫着。
“I’m the enemy again,” said Charlie, sighing.
“我又成敌人了。”查理说着叹了一口气。
“Or I am,” said Grandma Sally.
“或者我才是呢。”奶奶莎莉说道。
【背景知识】这是一段颇具戏剧性和趣味的描写。一方面刻画了渡鸦的聪明伶俐和刁钻泼辣,另一方面也传神地描绘了人和渡鸦之间的融洽关系以及彼此冲突。渡鸦有自己的生活程式和喜好,难免不符合人类的标准,需要彼此适应才行。
【第一段】英文缩写词DNA要不要翻译,是一个棘手问题。如果译为“脱氧核糖核酸”,中文读者反而会不清楚,因为中文语境里平时也是说DNA。因此,译者决定保留英文形式。最后一句中的he是指查理,因为查理和奶奶猜测蓝天和松果是兄妹,曾经被爷爷纠正过不要猜测。
【第二段】所谓的Raven Day Care Center,是一个幽默说法,中文也使用了幽默说法“渡鸦日托中心”。这一段又出现了象声词gro、quork,译者需要根据情况适当用中文的象声词来加以再现。
【第三段】查理说的话,暗示蓝天希望把松果引到屋里,怕她离开。而查理安慰蓝天,松果不会轻易离开。后文的词组fancy postures以及some ego都不容易翻译,译者分别做了具体化的处理。
【第四段】第二句当中exchanged glances很简练,译文却要仔细。这里不宜简单翻译为“交换了眼色”,真实的意思是查理和奶奶互相使眼色,让对方看看爷爷走路很稳健。下面查理的记录体现了他的矛盾心理。他想记录爷爷的健康因为渡鸦而好转,但是因为考虑到爷爷一切要严谨的提醒,又觉得证据不足,最后删除了记录。
【第五段】第一句是一个复杂句,后面有一个时间状语从句。为了保证原文的信息结构,译文并没有调整句式,同时保证了中文句子顺畅。除非中文表达无法接受,否则译文应该尽量保留原文的信息流顺序。后面的动词serve,翻译起来有难度,意思是给爷爷吃药。serve在这里是“提供药,端药,上药”的意思。后来奶奶改成把药放到饭菜里了。因此译文是“建议奶奶莎莉换一种方法来给爷爷服药”。
【第六段】这里的象声词ca不容易翻译,为了跟上文的“嘎嘎”区分开,译文使用了“咔咔”来对应。奶奶称蓝天为坏鸟,让查理不高兴,所以翻白眼。原文所谓的B-word不能直译,译文使用了“咒骂的话”。
【第七段】奶奶的话里有一个词语in my world,如果直译为“在我的世界里”,有些费解,显得太笼统。译文将其具体化为“在我看来”。后文的象声词kek译为“嘅嘅”,目的是与上文的象声词区分开。
【小结】本选段的翻译难点主要是词语,尤其是象声词的翻译。英语里象声词本来不是很多,这一选段中却使用频繁。译者借用了中文里的一些象声词来对应原文,力求体现原文的丰富用词。同时,原文里有幽默用语和一些较为特殊的词语用法,译文也一一做了相应的处理。
* 北京外国语大学英语学院教授。上海外国语大学英语翻译学博士,南京大学外国语学院翻译学出站博士后,英国伦敦大学访问学者。研究领域:翻译研究、文学翻译理论与实践、中国文化外译。译著有《文学百科》《女性心理学》《爱尔兰人与中国》《性、生态、灵性》《小公主》等,共约200多万字。专著有《文学翻译中的美学效果比较分析》《后殖民翻译研究——翻译和权力关系》。