We’re Stuck in a Digital World困在数字世界的我们

I was born in 1981. I don’t remember much， but I think it was Monday because the gynecologist1 had dark circles under his eyes. We used to play soccer in the street， we hated going to school， and we would look forward to opening a new bottle of Coca-Cola at Sunday lunches. There were no cellphones in my house， we printed things out to keep them， and we kept pictures in albums on the shelves in the living room. My God， I’m so old， I think I’m in the throes2 of a mid-life crisis.

我生于1981年。生日是哪天记不太清了，但我想那天应该是个周一，因为那位妇科医生顶着一对黑眼圈。我们过去常常在街上踢足球，讨厌上学，总是盼着周日午餐时能开一瓶新的可口可乐。那时我家里没有手机，我们把东西打印出来保存，照片则放在客厅书架上的相册里。天哪，我真是老了，似乎正处于中年危机的痛苦之中。

Our favorite plan was an outing to the countryside， we watched sports on TV， and we listened to the radio first thing in the morning to find out what the latest news in the world was. There were wars， but we hardly ever saw deaths live on television， charity was not a progressive movement against inequality for a sustainable world and it was not in the hands of big woke corporations3 but of small churches， and we cared for the elderly and widowed at home until God called them to his presence.

我们最喜欢的活动是去乡下郊游。我们在电视上看体育节目，每天早上第一件事就是听广播，了解最新的世界新闻。那时虽有战争，但电视上几乎看不到死亡的直播画面。那时的慈善活动并不是为了可持续发展的世界而反对不平等的进步运动，也不掌握在贴有“觉醒”标签的大型企业手中，而是由小教堂来组织。我们在家里照顾鳏寡老人，直到上帝召唤他们去他跟前。

We flirted with a certain future perspective. I mean that our emotional life went beyond the actual mating. To flirt， you had to know one another. To know one another， you had to talk to one another， to talk to one another you had to meet in a café， or at the university， or in the library， or in the village where we used to spend the summer. Animals were not just another member of the family and no one demanded that they behave like humans， the prices of things were not in the hands of politicians but of the market， and true friendships were sealed with a handshake and not with a double click.

我们曾是抱着对未来的确切打算才眉来眼去。换句话说，我们的情感生活远不止是单纯的生理结合。要想谈感情，首先得彼此熟识；要熟识，必须交谈；要交谈，就得在咖啡馆、大学、图书馆，或是我们过去常常前往消夏的那个小村里相遇。那时动物还不算是家庭成员，也没有人强求它们像人类一样行为得体；物价由市场调控，而非由政客操纵；真正的友谊是通过握手而不是鼠标双击来维系的。

I don’t know about you， but there are days when I wake up with an urgent need to escape from this digital jungle， this plastic world， in which we have exchanged feelings for tons of made-up ones and zeros. No， I am not the founder of a new Luddism4， I do not believe that any past time is better， and I do not intend to make an amendment5 to the whole of the 21st century. But I am in a crisis. I have gray hairs even under my fingernails， I am traversing the year 2023 like an alien to my time， and if my face has not started to wrinkle， it is only because of the unfathomable6 things of genetics.

不知你们是否有这种感觉，但有些日子我一觉醒来，便有一种强烈的冲动，想逃离这片数字丛林，逃离这个虚假做作的世界。在这个世界里我们用成堆虚拟的0和1来交流感受。不，我不是新一代卢德主义的发起人，不认为过去的一切时光都更美好，也无意对整个21世纪进行全面修正，但我确实陷入了危机。就连我的指甲缝里都长着白发，而2023年的我就像个不合时宜的外星人。若我的脸上尚未布满皱纹，那恐怕只是由于基因的神秘作用。

A couple of nights ago， paying a succulent7 bill at a restaurant， my bank card failed， the option to pay with my cellphone didn’t work either， and I realized that I haven’t had cash on me in a long time. I called my bank’s emergency phone， where I listened to several very soothing songs， and chatted for about 10 minutes with a robot whose questions went on an endless damn loop no matter what I answered， which at this stage included something about the programmer’s mother’s unedifying8 past. I walked to six different ATMs in the rain and in the wee9 hours of the morning until at last one of them released the money my bank card had refused to， and I returned to the bar to pay the debt in cash， getting wet again and cursing the entirety of the digital age.

几天前的夜晚，我在餐厅结账时，面对一张高昂的账单，却发现银行卡无法使用，手机支付也失灵了。这时我才意识到，自己已经很久没带现金出门。我拨通银行的紧急电话，听了几首“舒缓身心”的音乐，然后与一个机器人客服周旋了近10分钟。无论我回答什么内容，甚至爆了粗口，它的提问还是无休无止陷入可恶的循环。我冒着大雨，辗转尝试了6台自动取款机，最后直到凌晨才有一台吐出了银行卡先前拒绝支付的现金。我这才重回吧台用现金结账，又被淋湿一次，同时在心中诅咒着整个数字时代。

This is not an isolated event. A couple of weeks ago， I missed a train because my phone had no network connection at the exact moment I had to pass my digital ticket through the reader， and in the middle of Christmas， I spent several days unable to access the mail because I had forgotten the password that the server itself had previously forced me to change. In between， traveling around Spain， I almost had to eat a huge bag of garbage because the bin I was supposed to throw it in was closed and would only open if I swiped a digital resident card that， as I was vacationing in a tourist apartment， I obviously did not have. On the way back home， nine hours of night driving in the rain， I almost drove myself off the road because I had updated the app that warns me about speed cameras and in the middle of the trip I was startled by its loud warning of “attention： drones flying over the area！”， to which I responded with a swerve10， a shiver， and several kilometers of driving without actually looking at the road， scanning the starry night sky to find those damn UFOs that the government has put into circulation to fine us.

这绝非个例。几周前，我错过了一趟火车，只因在刷电子车票的关键时刻，手机突然没了网络连接。在圣诞节期间，我整整几天无法登录邮箱，只因忘记了服务器之前强制我更改的密码。在西班牙旅行期间，我差点儿不得不吃掉一大袋垃圾，因为应该扔垃圾的垃圾桶关着，只有刷电子居民卡才能打开，而我只是暂住在旅游公寓中度假，显然没那张卡。回家途中，我在雨中连夜开了9个小时的车，结果差点儿冲出公路，只因我刚更新了提醒注意超速摄像头的应用程序，它在途中突然以震耳欲聋的声音警告：“注意！区域内有无人机巡航！”这一嗓子吓得我猛打方向盘，浑身一激灵，并且在接下来的几公里中几乎没再看路，而是紧盯缀满星星的夜空，寻找那些政府派来罚款的“该死的不明飞行物”。

You will understand that， faced with the flood of digitalization， from the most practical to the most sentimental of sorts， one begins to feel uncomfortable. And sometimes， when no one is looking at me， I close my eyes and long for the world of yesteryear11 when we still had a life， when we looked into people’s eyes， when we lived and spoke without leaving a trace， and when we dared to say “I love you” for real.

你应该能理解，面对从实务到感性方方面面无所不在的数字化浪潮，人们会逐渐觉得不适。有时候，当四下无人，我会闭上眼睛，怀念那个已经远去的世界。那时我们尚有生活可言，会直视彼此的眼睛，言语和行动不会留下痕迹记录。那时我们敢于真诚地说出“我爱你”。

（译者单位：大连外国语大学）

1 gynecologist妇科医生。  2 throes剧痛；痛苦的挣扎。

3指那些在社会问题、种族、性别平等和包容性等议题上表现出强烈立场并采取行动的公司。  4 Luddism卢德主义。工业革命初期，有工人认为是机器的出现使工人失业，于是开始了破坏机器的卢德运动。现在这个词指对工业化、自动化、数字化等一切新科技盲目反对的态度。  5 amendment修正；修订。

6 unfathomable难以理解的；莫测高深的。  7 succulent多汁的；美味的。文中意思为昂贵的。  8 unedifying不光彩的；令人厌恶的。  9 wee很小的；极小的。

10 swerve突然转弯；急转弯。  11 yesteryear往昔；过去的岁月。