匠心独运,写好文章结尾
作者: 王思【问题导读】
一篇文章通常由开头、主体和结尾三个部分组成,古人常把这三个部分比喻成“凤头”“猪肚”和“豹尾”。意思是说,文章的开头要像凤凰的头一样美丽、精彩,主体内容要像猪的肚子那样充实、饱满,而结尾要像豹子的尾巴那样刚健、有力。读好的结尾犹如咀嚼干果,品尝香茗,令人回味再三。可见,精彩的文章结尾和炫目的开头一样重要。读后续写的结尾也是阅卷老师的阅读体验点和打分点,精彩的结尾能让阅卷老师打出更高的分数。
【名师导学】
1. 高考读后续写是通过让学生阅读一篇未完结的故事,然后根据所给出的情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。续写部分分成两段,每段的开头已经给出。
2. 从高考读后续写的评分标准来看,读后续写注重续写短文与原文的衔接程度,包括语篇主旨、文章内容和语言风格的衔接。
3. 好的结尾如“画龙点睛”,而不是“画蛇添足”。在续写故事的时候,如果我们的结尾能够呼应前文,升华主题,引发思考,让人意犹未尽,那这就是一个好的文章结尾。
【案例导引】
阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。
Coffee on the wall
Big snowflakes were pouring down from the sky. I sat with my friend in a wellknown coffee shop in a neighboring town of Venice, Italy, a city of lights and water.
As we enjoyed our coffee, a welldressed man entered, took off his hat and sat at an empty table beside us. He then called the waiter and placed his order saying, “Two cups of coffee, please. One of them there on the wall.”
Upon hearing this order, both of us were amazed, so we kept on observing with interest. It seemed that the waiter wasnt surprised at all. He took the order and left. Ten minutes later, the waiter came back with only one cup of coffee. The man thanked the waiter and began to enjoy the coffee. However, when he left, he paid for two.
After the man left, the waiter returned to collect the cup and put a piece of paper on the wall saying “A cup of coffee”. Seeing this, my friend and I looked at each other with confusion.
Just as we were guessing what the piece of paper on the wall meant, two elegant ladies entered. They sat down at the same table and ordered three cups of coffee: two on the table and one on the wall. When the two ladies left, they paid for three cups of coffee. This time also, the waiter did the same; he put a piece of paper on the wall saying “A cup of coffee”.
It was something unique and confusing for us. Out of curiosity, we decided to stay in the shop and kept on watching. We glanced at the wall and found that there were three pieces of paper on the wall at that time.
About 30 minutes later, the door was opened and an old man entered. The old man was poorly dressed, which was quite unfit for a coffee shop. To our surprise, the waiter greeted the man respectfully and led him to the table near us.
Paragraph 1:
As the old man seated himself, he looked at the wall and said, “One cup of coffee from the wall.”
Paragraph 2:
Now there were only two pieces of paper left on the wall, but we came to understand everything.
一、故事梳理
本文讲述的是“我”和朋友在一间咖啡店的所见所闻。当地居民进店喝咖啡的时候会多点一杯咖啡“贴在墙上”,而那些本来喝不起咖啡的人可以进来免费喝一杯“贴在墙上”的咖啡。请客的人和享用的人并不知道对方是谁,服务员和这堵墙就是双方之间的桥梁。当地居民对他人的这份心意造就了这个有爱的和谐世界!
二、常用招式
妙招1:自然式结尾
自然式结尾是指顺着文章的自然发展趋势结束全文,使文章结构完整,故事情节完整。这样的结尾没有套话,没有空话,给人自然、明快的感觉。
文章第一段“I sat with my friend in a wellknown coffee shop in a neighboring town of Venice, Italy, a city of lights and water.”交代了故事发生的背景:“我”和朋友当时正在咖啡店里喝咖啡。当“我们”听到别人点咖啡的方式(除了点自己喝的,还多点了一杯“贴在墙上”),觉得很奇特,就决定留下来看个究竟。最后,当一位衣衫褴褛的老人进来点了一杯“贴在墙上”的咖啡之后,一切就豁然开朗了。谜题解开了,“我”和朋友自然也该离开了。所以这里我们可以用“Since everything was clear, we finished our coffee, paid the bill and left with satisfaction.”自然地结束全文。
妙招2:首尾呼应式结尾
首尾呼应式结尾是指续写的文章结尾与原文开头相呼应。前有伏笔,后有照应,这种结尾方式能使文章结构更加紧密、严谨,内容更加深刻、完整,且更能与读者产生共鸣。
故事开始时,天空飘着鹅毛大雪,这说明天气相当恶劣,非常寒冷。但是,当“我”和朋友目睹了当地居民匿名赠送咖啡的暖心举动后,“我们”感受到的不再是漫天飞雪的寒冷,而是一种由内而外的温暖。用“Though it was still snowing heavily, all we could feel now was the surpassing warmth.”来结尾,刚好可以与文章第一句“Big snowflakes were pouring down from the sky.”相呼应。